Biting My Tongue (sort of)

I am very picky about my music. It may look unorganized, but everything has it's place. I've got it divided into piles according to voice part and style. The frequently used books are on the top, less frequently used gravitate towards the bottom. Rarely used music is in a separate place. This system has become a necessity ever since my large, beautiful shelf with all the cubby holes went into storage.

Last night there was an open house of sorts for my father-in-laws birthday. (Happy Birthday!) When I came up this morning, my music was a mess!

My nicely organized and neat piles were askew. The bass music was with the classical books. The tenor books were stacked with the soprano books. Several books were temporarily MIA, including my beloved mezzo books.

Why do people assume that just because it's there they can mess with it? And why do they assume that because it's in piles it doesn't matter where they put it back?

There is a Reason

Last night two members of the Relief Society Presidency came over to visit my mother in law and give her a handout from the visiting teaching luncheon she missed on Saturday. Well, I suppose they came to visit her and happened to have a handout to give me, too.

They come in and one of them said, "Oh look! Stacy's here, too!"

I said, "Who?"

Apparently, she thought my name was Stacy.

I've lived in this ward for 8 1/2 months, and members of the RS Presidency don't know my name. Is it any wonder I feel like I don't belong here? Is it any wonder that I'm incredibly anxious to move?

GOE

Grade of Execution. It matters. It really does. And it begs the question: when it comes to life, what is my grade of execution?

Do I do what I'm supposed to, my required elements, uprightly and fervently? Or do I throw them out there, sticking the landing, but rather leaning my way into it? Do I practice and plan so that I can give the best of myself, or do I rely on sheer talent and luck to pull me through?

I think I need to work more on my grade of execution. Because as I saw last night, it can make all the difference.

Happiness is...Road Construction?

As I was driving down Redwood Road this morning I was unsurprised to see the orange flags, barricades and signs to prevalent in Utah during the spring and summer. What did surprise me was how happy that made me feel. Why would indications of slow traffic and major delays make me happy?

David is a chemical analyst. (I love saying that, people generally don't know how to respond.) And as part of his new job (I love saying that, too!) he does a lot of work with the DMV. In other words, when road construction starts, he gets flooded with new samples to analyze.

Things in my life seem to be working themselves out pretty well right now. After months of waiting, we're going to be looking at houses starting tomorrow *YEA!!!!* and are hoping to find the right one for our family very soon. David has a job that he doesn't dread going to. I have voice students that I love. The kids are doing well at school, and have survived living in Grandma's basement. My children are donating money to our house. We are pulling together as a family to make our lives better. And road construction reminds me of that.

When you're on the roads this spring and frustrated with the signs of orange everywhere, remember that road construction means a better life. It means work. It means happiness. It means hope.

I am a child of the Cold War

I was unreasonably happy that Russia lost the pairs figure skating.

Go China!

Hmmm

Have you ever noticed that certain music only fits certain days?

Query

Who do you believe to be the most influential musician of the 20th Century?

Taking into consideration not only musical influence, but also cultural and social change, David and I decided that we would rank the Beatles number one, with an emphasis on Paul McCartney, but specifically John Lennon.

Anyone else?

Here's Hoping

David and I recently discovered that we qualify for the $6500 tax credit for repeat home buyers. This is an amazing thing, and we're working as hard as we can to get everything finished before the deadline.

Sadly, it all hinges on things that are outside of our control.

1. We have to get all of our tax documents on time. It's really sad, but in spite of a deadline for companies to have tax documents out, many think they can postpone it, or find some kind of loophole, and frequently don't get those very important pieces of paper in the mail on time. I'm very hopeful that this year we'll get everything by Feb 1.

2. We have to receive a large enough refund. We made less money this year (unemployment does that to you) and ended up paying more in taxes. This should equal a larger refund. Right? Hope abounds!

3. We have to close by April 30, 2010. This is the tricky one. We haven't found our house yet, and even if we find a house in plenty of time, there's always a possibility that the closing date could be after the deadline. We can push for it to happen before, and I'm sure our agent would be willing to do that. The other obstacle is that if our home happens to be a bank owned foreclosure or short sale, then the bank has all sorts of control over everything. Historically, short sales are not known for their speedy closure. Still, I have to hope that this too will work out.

As January meanders to a close, I find myself more hopeful about actually owning my own home again than I have in a while. The days may be filled with bad air and winter storms, but I see sunshine everywhere!

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Marianne Williamson

A Day to Celebrate

I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.

Martin Luther King, Jr.

Milestone

Happy 16th Anniversary!

(That would be to David and Myself!)

For Kate

Part One: Life
XXXII

Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words,
And never stops at all,

And sweetest in the gale is heard;
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.

I've heard it in the chillest land,
And on the strangest sea;
Yet, never, in extremity,
It asked a crumb of me.

Emily Dickinson

*happy sigh*

Did you know the temple is even better when you unexpectedly run into old friends and family there?

Really?

Our washing machine is on it's last leg. On Tuesday it took me 3 1/2 hours to wash one load of jeans. The regular cycle won't completely fill, and so the sensor to agitate won't turn on, and so the machine just keeps filling and filling and filling, wasting water and time. Fortunately, the casual cycle will fill, but it doesn't agitate as well, so I have to run clothes through multiple rinse cycles in order to get them clean. And then, it also doesn't spin as fast, leaving the clothes sopping wet when they come out of the washer. Therefore, the poor dryer, which was never very efficient to begin with, has to work way to hard for it's little electric engine. Thus, 3 1/2 hours after I started, I had clean jeans.

David and I decided it was time to purchase the washer/dryer for our future new home. (That future is coming soon!) We did our research online, traveled to many stores and checked our deals, and finally settled on a great front loading set from Home Depot. It was $200 cheaper per piece than anywhere else we had seen.

We make our decision, find a sales person to help us, and start the check our process.

Guess what?! They can't deliver my washer for 2 weeks!

AUGH!!!!! REALLY?

I almost wish I had gone with Lowe's. They guarantee next day delivery.

Ouch

Did you know substitute teaching in a choir class the first day back from Christmas break is a painful experience?

The teacher hasn't had time to put new music in the folder. The kids really aren't ready to be back yet. And in the case of one choir, they don't get new music anyway, the class ends in two weeks. And with no final except a Christmas concert, they have no motivation to be there.

At least the kids all came. And came back after they used the bathroom.

I did have one student tell me, "I'm glad it's you today. I wish it could always be you here."

Hand Wash Only

Most of my hand wash clothing is winter wear.

This means I'm sticking my hands in freezing cold water (straight from frozen pipes) in order to wash the clothing that's supposed to keep me warm.

Does anyone else see the irony?

Fashion

Hot pink tights keep your legs warm.

Thoughts

I haven't been a good blogger this last year.

I'd like to say that I've been spending all my time writing in my journal, but that isn't the case either. I think that this last year was so full of painful things that I just didn't want to remember them. I'm sure I'll regret that later (much, much later), but for now, I'm grateful that I survived 2009 and am looking forward to a brand new year.

Happy New Year!